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Google Bought Nest.
What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
Exciting Implications for Google's 'Smart' Home, Especially for Advertisers
by Deacon Webster -CCO, Walrus
as written for AdAge
January 24, 2014
Google's $3.2 billion purchase of Nest, makers of web connected thermostats and smoke detectors, has attracted a lot of attention. Undoubtedly the appeal to Google goes beyond simply getting a foothold in the household gadget market. The real prize is Nest's data, collected by an array of sensors placed throughout the house.
Here are just a few of the things you can look forward to in your Google/Nest interconnected home of the future:
- Your Nest, noticing that you've been in the bedroom all day with the temperature set at 81 degrees, has Google shopping express send over some Nyquil and a cold compress.
- You burn your dinner badly and trigger a text message from Papa John's pizza owner John Schnatter who offers you 10% off a medium pepperoni pie. Moments later you receive a second text, hilariously revealing that the first text actually came from Peyton Manning who felt bad about your dinner and personally authorized the 10% discount – boy is John gonna be ticked off when he finds out!
- The Nest senses a new heat signature coming from your guinea pig cage and takes the opportunity to add "I'm a piggy Daddy" to your gmail signoff along with a link to a PetSmart gift registry.
- After a flood of divorce lawyer spam, you realize that the Nest senses you've been sleeping on the couch for the past month.
- From its overhead vantage point, our Nest smoke detector determines that you are balding and takes the liberty of ordering up some generic Minoxidil from Google marketplace.
- A new Google Analytics feature called "Chuck-E-Cheese Family Fun Time" measures time spent with your kids. Too much time apart wins you free Skee Ball tickets on your next visit to any Pizza-Time Theater.
- A slight increase in humidity levels in your living room generates a Fresh Step sponsored g-chat with an animatronic cat, who informs you that it's time to change your litter.
- Monster.com sponsors an innovative campaign that sets off your smoke alarm every time you sleep until 11 on a week day. The alarm is reprogrammed to scream "Seize the Day!" during the promotional period and can only be disabled by entering a coupon code on Monster. (It wins the Grand Prix at Cannes).
- The Aflac Duck mysteriously adds you as a friend on Google+
- You trigger your Nest hallway light too many nights in a row and suddenly every website you visit is sponsored by Depends and Lunesta.
- Whenever you go online to search for anything, the Google doodle just bursts into flames – a fun inside joke between you and your Nest.
- Coors Light pays to set the air-conditioning in your house to −10 while you're out of town. When you return the smoke detector screams "Tap the rockies!" while blasting Love Train by the O'Jays.
- Thanks to Nest's web-connected activity sensors, a troop of hackers determine that you're on vacation and take the opportunity to clear your place out. Fittingly this includes your $250 thermostat.
View the article on AdAge.